What many don't seem to understand is how rewarding it can be to take the time to reach out to someone who is alone and afraid.  It doesn't take a lot of our time but in doing so we do so much to validate that person's feelings of self worth. To say nothing of what it does for one's own.

Those who are alone  suffer as much, if not more, pain from the loneliness and sense of abandonment which they face each day as they grow older as they do from the illnesses with which the elderly are so often afflicted .  So many of them  attempt to find the courage to face the hours of each new day and still maintain some semblance of  their self respect and dignity  whilst dependent on the companionship  of  only professional caregivers.

 There are so many lonely people in this world, particularly among the elderly. Many in failing health or near the end of their life span and abandoned by those they have nurtured and loved  without any expectation of  reward. It is so unfortunate that now, as they approach  the end of their lives, they are too often left to face that unknown future with fear and trepidation and with no loved ones nearby.

 Add to that the loss of dignity as their own bodies betray them and they find themselves dependent on virtual strangers to provide assistance and their pain is as agonizing as any one can experience.  The pain may be as much emotional  as it is physical , although I wonder often if that physical pain is not intensified by the broken spirit of a mother or father who find they have no place in their now adult children's lives.

 Someone once said ..."Nobody can do for little children what grandparents do. Grandparents sprinkle stardust over the lives of little children."   Sadly, today far too many have lost sight of this. Unfortunately  for those children whose parents have no place in their lives for the elderly in their families they are missing so many happy hours and so much love which is theirs for the taking. To say nothing of losing an irreplaceable link to their heritage as well.

In this modern world of ours we have sacrificed so much in the name of progress. One of the saddest things is the loss of connection between generations.  The generation of grandparents who are shunted aside and ignored today except on compulsory desultory  visitations is mind boggling.

These irreplaceable family members still have so much to give, not only to our children but to us as well.  The gift of their time and their memories, and the lessons learned through the many years of their lives, is a resource of incalculable value. And yet, all too often this is  ignored as they sit day after day in nursing homes warehoused like used and abandoned old pieces of furniture.  Those poor souls are so grateful for even small tokens of kindness which recognize their existence as individuals. They ask for so little. Respect which should be theirs unequivocally, but is absent. The right to live out their days in dignity and with pride intact. An occasional visit from grandchildren whose pictures adorn the walls of their room, or cubicle as the case may be. Doesn't sound like a lot does it? But to them it means everything.

The hidden secret of  far too many of these dear aged people is that to be in these institutions is to them, despite the loneliness and broken hearts, a haven from abuse inflicted upon them  by those to whom they gave life and a large portion of their hearts and who now find the burden of aging parents one they are not prepared to assume.  Far more often than we ever imagine the abuse has been physical in nature  but almost always there has been financial abuse involved. They are the silent victims. To allow anyone to know of their heartbreak is an abandonment of their children in their eyes and the shame they feel, plus their misguided sense of loyalty, demands that they remain silent. And so they count each day that has passed as one less day to have to deal with the pain they live with each and every day.

Time spent with these dear people is among the most rewarding experiences of my life.  The hazards of course  include the tears and sadness of saying that final good-bye to those embarking on their final journey, because you cannot be around these dear lonely people and not take them into your heart, but this is a small price to pay for the pleasure of knowing you may have made at least some of those last days easier.

It is amazing to me how many elderly people are still so eager to learn and keep informed about the world around them.  I have two friends I have been privileged to come to know through my web site.  They both sent email to me  expressing gratitude for  my helping them to fill empty hours with my pages. As a result we have become pen pals. One is a man of 91, and the other a woman  who was a Red Cross Nurse in World War 2. Both of them have taken computer courses to enable them to master the intricacies of these new fangled machines and now communicate with others via the internet. Even at their age they are still  eager to meet life head on. What a plethora of knowledge people like these could give the children of today if only given the opportunity to do so ! And what a privilege it is to know them.

 Once again I have been reminded  though my time with the elderly and from these very special friends of mine that "beautiful young people are accidents of nature, but beautiful old people truly are works of art". I have always known this of course thanks to my very much loved  Grandfather and my many hours spent with him, every moment of which I still treasure to this day, and whom I still  miss even now so many years after his passing.

I fully intend to continue adding to my 'art' collection  in the months and years ahead. Think about it ...  perhaps even set aside an hour here and there to join me in collecting a few 'art treasures' of your own.  I promise  .. you will never be sorry you did so.